Le poids des mots - Parlons-en ! #4

After a class, a young man comes up to me and says, "Rabbi, I wanted to tell you I'm engaged." And I said to him, " Oh, that's great, mazel tov!" He looks at me and says, "Do you think she's not the right one?" And I look at him and say, "First of all , I don't even know who it is." But he had a reaction because he was perhaps expecting something more like, " Oh, mazel tov!" And I, having my mind elsewhere, just said, "Oh, mazel

tov!" But in a slightly more neutral tone. And it struck me because I thought! "Because if he hadn't told me, he might have gone home thinking, 'Well, there's a problem.'" "I mean, I'm not saying the person is a problem, but at some point, we must not forget that whether we like it or not, words have an impact." We see it in the parent-child relationship. And obviously, when you represent something symbolically for people, you need to realize that the words you speak can have repercussions and be

extremely careful.

Well, those who give advice don't have to pay the price. That is why on certain subjects, I am in the habit of saying, "This is how I understand things, period." "This is the way I perceive it." And I use this notion of the conditional a lot , not to avoid taking responsibility, but simply because there are so many factors in a question, you have to be extremely careful and take the time to